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Jun
16

Warhammer 40K: Who's Got The Best Rock?

The battlefields of the 41st millennium range from toxic swamps to sprawling megacities to volcanic wastelands, but there's one thing that unites them all - rocks. Whether they're the result of natural geological processes, the rubble of a levelled outpost or the remnants of an exploded moon, rocks are everywhere. This, presumably, is why Games Workshop feel reasonably secure in adding sculpted rocks to so many of their miniatures' bases - no matter where your army hails from or what basing scheme you use, you can't go wrong with a rock. Join me now as we count down the top 10 best rocks in Warhammer 40K.

 

10: Emperor's Champion, Black Templars

This rock may be fairly small and unassuming at first glance, but look closer and you'll see that there's a lot to get excited about. Firstly, it's got a certain craggy quality to it that's quite pleasing to the eye. Secondly (and far more importantly) it has the strength to support a fully power-armoured Emperor's Champion space marine. It's not just supporting him either, but actively overpowering him - see how this so-called champion's leg appears to be buckling under the strain of standing on it? Truly this is a powerful rock, and a worthy first entry in our countdown.

 

9: Primaris Captain, Space Marines

Our next entry is almost the exact opposite of the previous one. Rather than being rugged and powerful this rock is smooth and delicate - as evidenced by the way the space marines Primaris Captain is gently resting his foot on it, almost on tippy-toe. It's a singularly dainty posture for a space marine, and you have to give props to this rock for humbling this proud warrior so effortlessly.

 

8: Avatar of Khaine, Aeldari

This one feels like it should be higher on the list, but it stumbles on a technicality, much as a space marine might stumble on powerful and inconveniently-placed pebble. The fact that the stone on the Avatar of Khaine’s base is on fire is very rock 'n' roll (emphasis on rock, obviously), but since stone isn’t actually combustible this miniature loses marks for realism. It’s still a spectacular miniature, but when it comes to the rocky elements of the design it’s impossible to adequately suspend disbelief, earning the Avatar a lower (but still respectable) 8th place.

 

7: Lokhust Heavy Destroyer, Necrons

The Lokhust Heavy Destroyer appears to be floating in the air, which is obviously physically impossible for a plastic miniature, so what’s really going on here? If you look very closely, you’ll notice that the back end of the Lokhust is attached to a rock, which is itself attached to the model’s base – that’s right, the rock is literally carrying this whole model. Without it, the Lokhust would just be resting pathetically on the ground and would probably have to drag itself around slowly using its arms or something. I only hope that the rock is getting something out of this relationship, because from where I’m standing it looks like only one party is really benefitting here. It’s not the most interesting rock on this list, but it’s definitely the hardest working.

 

6: Mortarion, Daemon Primarch of Nurgle

Now we come to the point in our countdown where the rocks have a little more going on visually. You can tell that Games Workshop's designers really went to town on this one, with the rocks being quite large and also having a pleasingly smooth, swooshy aspect. Still, they're massively overshadowed by the daemon primarch Mortarion himself, who for some reason insists on hogging the limelight and prevents this miniature from ranking higher on this list.

 

5: Chief Librarian Tigurius, Ultramarines

I guess mankind must have a thing for standing around in rubble, because from hereon in it's Imperium all the way! Some might say that Chief Librarian Tigurius is standing on a ruined pillar and not a rock at all, but what is a ruined pillar of not a rock that's had greatness thrust upon it before being knocked back down again? It wasn't just knocked off its pedestal - it literally was the pedestal. This not only gives the rock a beautifully tragic backstory, it literally elevates the miniature to new heights and looks good doing it. Tigurius is standing on the shoulders of giants here.

 

4: Vindicare Assassin, Imperium

Finally a rock gets top billing! This rock is huge compared to the Vindicare Assassin, being a whole head taller than the supposed subject of the miniature. Of course, they have to say that this is a model of an assassin standing next to a rock, but really it's a model of an absolutely majestic rock with a dude hanging around next to it so that you have some sense of scale. This miniature is perfect for those new to the hobby to hone their rock painting skills before moving on to grander things.

 

3: Ephrael Stern, Adepta Sororitas

Are they rocks or bricks? Who cares when there are so many of them and they're arranged so beautifully. Ephrael Stern & Kyganil are supposedly the main attraction here, but obviously we know it's the rocks. Rarely has a miniature so exquisitely captured the exact moment that a pile of rocks is kicked over by a warrior-nun in the process of taking flight. Perhaps more than any other miniature in Warhammer 40K, this one truly captures the literal collapse of the Imperium in the most visceral way possible. Bravo.

 

2: The Triumph of Saint Katherine, Adepta Sororitas

We’ve hit the motherlode! Behold The Triumph of Saint Katherine! Not only is the base of this miniature absolutely massive, not only is it completely covered from edge to edge in gloriously sculpted stone, but it’s also positively festooned with rubble in all shapes and sizes. There is no more comprehensive a representation of masonry in 40K outside of a terrain piece, and to see so much rock on a miniature is a real treat. A triumph indeed!

 

1: The Rock, Fortress-Monastery of the Dark Angels

The clue is in the name here. It's THE Rock - the definitive article. No other rock in Warhammer 40K comes close in terms of history, majesty and sheer size. You may say that there are bigger rocks out there, but I say that those are probably moons – you can’t classify moons as rocks, that’s just silly. You may also object that this is a list of miniatures and that there is no miniature of The Rock, owing to the fact that such a thing would probably occupy an entire aircraft hangar. Well, I never said that this was exclusively a list of miniatures, so there. Still not satisfied? Fine. How about this miniature of Primaris Lieutenant Zakariah? He’s standing on a perfectly serviceable rock.

If you want to you can even imagine that his rock is located somewhere on The Rock. Nothing is set in stone after all.

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